I started this blog as part of my effort to “scare” myself just a little everyday. Maybe it is too much of a challenge and that is why I have avoided posting anything on it. Yes, the dog and his issues put me into a bit of a funk for a while… I am so good at rationalizing behaviors that will give me the excuse I want so that I will not follow through with something. Maybe the blog idea, even it is only me who reads it will give me that push I need to follow through on some of the many ideas percolating in my head. So what does this have to do with retirement. Everything.
My mind is full of all of these things that I want to do and seem not to follow through with because I use all kinds of rationalizing thoughts to not do them or start them and not follow through with them…. and of course my number one rationalizing thought is I don’t have enough time to …blog, exercise, walk the dogs, eat healthier, read more, plan, socialize more, dance more, listen to music more, play golf, train with a trainer, write in my journal, check off nagging tasks that have bugged me for years, organize myself, travel, garden, … because I WORK. Of course, if I retire I will have all this time to do all of these things…. That scares me. Why? Because I do have time now and I have not managed to stay committed to so many things. What makes me think that if I have even more time I will do them? Will I just have all of these wonderful thoughts and ideas rolling around in my head, not follow through, and then be bored and depressed and mad at myself for not working? At least, if I work, I get all of the social contact and challenges that are the part of my job that I really do enjoy and would miss. But if I continue to work next year, I will still have much more limited time to do what I think at this time in my life is what I have a real desire to do. Maybe it is is a bit too scary to face these questions? Is that why I stopped the blog?
OK. I have to do some things to help me with this decision. Follow through with 3 things even while working. If I can find time to do these three things and make them a habit, I will begin to prove to myself that I will follow through with my other “retirement ideas” when I have more time.
1. Blog: 3 times per week
2. Yoga: 2 times per week
3. Get advice on someone who can help with the decision.
